#αяєуσυяєα∂укι∂ѕ؟

ι ∂ση'т тнιηк уσυ αяє. уσυ ѕєє, ωє ℓιкє тσ gєт α вιт яσυgн ωнєη ωє ∂σ συя вυѕιηєѕѕ. ωє кησω уσυ'яє яєαℓ ηαмє. ρяєραяє яυѕѕℓє. ρяєραяє ƒσя #αηαℓ∂яιρραgє

#checkurprivlige

You guys need a really good privlige check. I haven't gotten a single message about what that message says even though I'm all over unifiction. I also just saw the posts that that guy made. I guess I know why my butt was sore now. And I guess he was the one who washed the walls. Luckily i sanitized my jimmies by leaving them in a bottle of coke for 5 minutes. Only some of them ended up dissolving but they all taste a bit weird now.

So I was frollicking in a field and I saw Slender out of the corner of my eye. Slender was just looking at me with his anti-face. He was at east 13 feet tall. He leaned over to get a closer look at me and reached his hand out. I took hold of his hand and he swung me up onto his shoulders and took me for a walk through the forest like Treebeard. He walked around for a while until we got to this big tree in the middle of the forest that was, like, 50 feet tall. Slender stretched his legs so that I could stand on the tip of the tree. Then I feel off and died.

So I woke up in my bed in a cold liquid. I still wonder why he washed the room.....

#wtfdidijustwatch

Ok so I just woke up in my house and the room was covered in a strange sticky substance. It was also strangely white in color. I then realized that my butt was rather soar around the area of the taint and I don't know why. Everything in the room was covered in this white sticky stuff. And I didn't want to taste because I thought it was you know what. That's right. Soap. Soap is really gross to the taste.

So then I looked at the computer and the screen said this in paint "ℓσℓ уσυ вυттнυят вяσ؟؟؟". The text is too messed up for me to read. If someone can translate it that would be awesome. I looked to my right and saw that someone had knocked my jimmies container over! I couldn't believe they would ruin such perfect. sanitized jimmies! Then I scooped them up and put them back in their urn. Never to be clean again.

So yeah I need that message translated. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks guys.

EDIT: Just tasted the stuff. It was soap.

#lovemyslendertato

вαѕк ιη тнє gℓσω σƒ тнє ѕℓєη∂єятαтσ вσяιѕ. нє ℓσνєѕ уσυ ѕσ уσυ мυѕт ℓσνє нιм вα¢к. ωє'яє ωαιтιηg ƒσя уσυ тσ вє яєα∂у. ρяєραяє уσυяѕєℓƒ ƒσя ιηѕєятιση. ι'м gσιηg ιη ∂яу.

#petmyanalpizza

уσυ ωιℓℓ кησω нιм ωнєη уσυ ѕєє нιм "вσяιѕ" яємємвєя тσ αℓℓωαуѕ ℓσσкѕ вσтн ωαуѕ ση тнє яσα∂ σƒ ℓιƒє ℓєѕт уσυ вє нιт ву тнє тяυ¢к σƒ ∂єαтн

#unifiction

So now someone linked my blog on this plac called Unifiction and it's about that game slendr and all these people are copying slender and making vlogs and stuff. I'm just like why can't they be original you know.

So I'm wondering why they would post it there and then I'm like Oh it's because they see the parallels between slender and pajama sam. Because if you think about it they're a lot alike, it's just pajama sam is more mentally hard. I tried Slender again and I will say it is pretty scary on 20 dollars mode. When the music swells you know shit's going down. And Ron Browz' lyrics are so fascinating and insightful. Slender definitely has good taste in music. (apparently the guy is named slender)

But I'm still confused why they posted me on unifiction because I'm not copying Slender. Unless....

WHAT IF THAT MAN AT 5 GUYS WAS SLENDER
OH MY GOD WHAT DO I DO IM GONNA DIE
OH GOD HES OUTSIDE MY WINDOW OH GOD HES IN MY DUNGEON HE'S COMING TO ME ASDOXLKHFJHASNZSXFLkAJSDBXGFZNOASLDHAKFZJBCN

#dayum

So this morning I went to 5 Guys for my everyday morning burger. I also got some fries and a drink. The guy at the cash register looked like he had bandages wrapped around his head or something and was wearing a suit. Like he was Abraham Lincoln or something. Despite his rudeness and bad attitude, the meal was still enjoyable. My burger had bacon on it and everything! But , on my way home, when I started eating my fries, they began nibbling at my fingertips. My french fries had mouths somehow! Like they were biting back after all these years of torture or something!

I employed the lesson I had learned from pajama sam and conquered my fears! I ATE THE FRIES!

Now I have some internal bleeding in my stomach and intestines. I'm in the hospital right now and when they got the fries out they were normal fires, so they could find no cause for the bleeding. They're gonna patch me up soon though. Hopefully I can go to 5 Guys tomorrow and not have it happen again. See you guys later!